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Antiviral and Spring Breakers: let’s get infected and live foreva

April 13, 2013
Oh, hell yes.

Oh, hell yes.

I’ve had the pleasure of watching a lot of movies over the last few days. Here are three brief reviews of each:

Thursday: Blue Valentine

I wanted to feel, like, very sad that night. I succeeded! Let me tell you how that went:

“Oh, dear god. Why has Ryan Gosling channeled the personality of four of my ex-boyfriends? Whyโ€ฆ”

Friday: Antiviral

Have you every pondered how swell it would be to be infected with the same strain of herpes that afflicts your favorite celebrity? Not really? You’re not alone. And you’d think with a premiss such as that (let’s get infected with this star’s herpes), this film would be way interesting. But it’s not.

Antiviral follows a young man who sells stars’ sexy viruses to the public, but secretly, he’s just as obsessed with these viruses as his clients. He drinks, injects and pretty much eye fucks these viruses. Then one day, he infects himself with something that’s not so curableโ€ฆsounds great, right?

Sadly, the vast majority of the film is not as amazing as I was hoping. I did enjoy a lot of the story (the celebrity “meat” and cell gardens as well as the faces of the virus bit — those who sell the virus have a machine that shows them how the virus “looks”).

However, kind of a bonus for women who like men that look like Nosferatu (probably just me), Caleb Landry Jones looks all insect-y and pale and generally not well. To me, that equals a win. A hot, sick win.

Hot.

Hot.

What to do? The film is beautiful and odd — the shots are crisp and bright. It’s worth it, but don’t expect a lot in the dialogue department.

Saturday: Spring Breakers

It’s everything you think it will be and not a lot more, but then, it is.

I mean, there are many tits and asses to gaze upon (men and women are equally exploited in the visual department, I think.) And yes, there’s a lot of sex, drugs and crazy-stupid parties, but what else is new. The premise (the parties and the drinking as well as the behavior of the characters) is nothing new. Most anyone who has gone to college has likely experienced “those” kinds of parties.

However, I really liked how the four main ladies were portrayed in Spring Breakers. All of them were able to guide their own stories, and were capable enough to pull themselves out of (or into) situations they didn’t/did want to be party to. No one was exploited by other characters in the film — if anything, they all thrived off each other in unique ways.

The film’s weak points: too many repeated scene sequences, and too long. I really think this would have made an amazing short film. Oh well. That’s just my taste.

What to do? This film is worth it. Please go watch it.

So, what do you all think? Have any of you seen the above films? Did you like ‘em?

Image credits:

Spring Breakers

I want to bite you

4 Comments leave one →
  1. April 14, 2013 2:57 pm

    Spring Breakers was a glorious film and I feel it’s Korine’s best since Gummo. I am very curious about Antiviral since I am a big David Cronenberg fan but, at this point, have yet to be afforded the opportunity to see it.

    • Abbie Stutzer permalink*
      April 14, 2013 8:35 pm

      So happy you enjoyed it, too! I was incredibly annoyed by the people in the theater — one even blurted out, “this is terrible,” in the middle. It made me laugh, but seriously, why go if you’re not willing to actually watch it and think about it. Do try to see Antiviral. If you have access to any type of OnDemand, I think it’s available there now.

      • April 15, 2013 9:31 am

        Yeah, that’s ridiculous, although I imagine whoever said it was terrible was probably the sort of person the film was insulting anyway, haha. Spring Breakers will likely be my favorite film of 2013.

      • Abbie Stutzer permalink*
        April 15, 2013 6:59 pm

        Ha! That is a very good point. Yeah, I have a feeling when I look back it will make my top ten.

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