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Halloween foreplay

October 28, 2009

Over the weekend, I did some Halloween prepping. I got a pumpkin to carve, and watched some terrible horror films.

OK. I watch terrible horror films every weekend, but I hardly ever carve anything…promise.


Beer 'n' Bible

A beer on top of a bible at a Halloween party. Yup. That beer owner is burning in hell right about now.



The first movie (which is the best-est b-movie I’ve seen in a while), was Drag Me To Hell. Gypsy curses on buttons, anvils falling on heads, eyes popping out of heads, and random things being flung into a helpless girl’s mouth (hey, get your minds out of the gutter)…It can’t get any better.

The second movie was Street Trash. It’s about a bunch of bums who buy a liquor called Viper. Instead of getting drunk when they’ve consumed the liquor, the bums start to melt into piles of neon goo (I think that’s what happens to kids who drink too much at Neon, too).

The movie also has a few other odd highlights:

– Cantonese hookers (this was the actual scene name on the “Scene selection” page. Yeah) attacking bums.
– Necrophilia (with a terribly un-real, mannequin-esque body).
– Bums playing keep away with a guy’s penis that’s cut of by a man having a war flashback.

That’s right. I’m recommending this movie…

because it’s hilarious.

So, I’m still trying to decide what to be for Halloween. I seriously have no idea. I have no cash, and no desire to show a lot of t*t-age.

I’m at a loss.

Help a girl out, and get in the Halloween spirit, folks.

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