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Day 2: Me: “Oh, so that’s your family?” Him: “I guess…”

July 4, 2010

July 2, 2010

11:29 a.m.

I say, God damn!

Nine and a half hours of sleep is a sexy thing.

Today is a day of nothing. Yeah, that might sound boring to most, but heck, I’m always on my feet, so it makes me happy.

I broke it. Just a little.

7:47 p.m.

Thus far, I’ve ran four miles on a state-of-the-art treadmill, watched the dog whisperer while doing yoga in a ridiculously small area, ate cheese and crackers and had wine at a way too early hour, and met my friend’s family members who were, well, interesting to say the least.

My vacation was brought to a new level of awkward when one of my friend’s aunts asked to touch my hair. She wanted to see how thick it was, and then asked me to do her makeup.

“I’m not artist,” I say. “I can hardly do my own. I get the shakes and stuff.”

That did the “stop the conversation” trick at the moment. I don’t do well when I have to touch another person’s face.

11:55 p.m.

Yup. It’s official. I’m in love with my friend’s grandpa. When we told him we didn’t have a corkscrew, he ducked into his camper for a bit and came out with one. He also makes his own wine.

A few things I’ve noticed about Janesville, Wisconsin:

~ do not expect to find a veggie meal without cheese. It doesn’t exist.

~ I will never (never ever) have kids. A backyard full of screaming children is the best birth control ever.

These ladies know how to work it.

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